President Bush–Accurate?
Posted Tuesday, February 23, 2010 by admin
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I think this is 100% accurate, and would be delighted if he actually gave a speech like this. Unfortunately, he cannot, as, despite all the negative attention, he needs to stay in office and do his job, like he has been for the past 4 years. Power to the President!
PRESIDENT BUSH’S RESIGNATION SPEECH
Normally, I start these things out by saying “My Fellow Americans.” I’m not doing it this time. If the polls are any indication, I don’t know who more than half of you are anymore. I do know something terrible has happened, and that you’re really not fellow Americans any longer.
I’ll cut right to the chase here: I quit. Now before anyone gets all in a lather about me quitting to avoid impeachment, or to avoid prosecution or something, let me assure you: there’s been no breaking of laws or impeachable offenses in this office. The reason I’m quitting is simple. I’m fed up with you people. I’m fed up because you have no understanding of what’s really going on in the world. Or of what’s going on in this once-great nation of ours. And the majority of you are too damned lazy to do your homework and figure it out.
Let’s start local. You’ve been sold a bill of goods by politicians and the news media. Polls show that the majority of you think the economy is in the tank. And that’s despite record numbers of homeowners including record numbers of MINORITY homeowners. And while we’re mentioning minorities, I’ll point out that minority business ownership is at an all-time high. Our unemployment rate is as low as it ever was during the Clinton Administration. I’ve mentioned all those things before, but it doesn’t seem to have sunk in.
Despite the shock to our economy of 9/11, the stock market has rebounded to record levels and more Americans than ever are participating in these markets. Meanwhile, all you can do is whine about gas prices, and most of you are too damn stupid to realize that gas prices are high because there’s increased demand in other parts of the world, and because a small handful of noisy idiots are more worried about polar bears and beachfront property than your economic security.
We face real threats in the world. Don’t give me this “blood for oil” thing. If I was trading blood for oil I would’ve already seized Iraq ’s oil fields and let the rest of the country go to hell. And don’t give me this ‘Bush Lied People Died’ crap either. If I was the liar you morons take me for, I would’ve easily had chemical weapons planted in Iraq so they could be ‘discovered.’ Instead, I owned up to the fact that the intelligence was faulty. Let me remind you that the rest of the world thought Saddam had the goods, same as me. Let me also remind you that regime change in Iraq was official US policy before I came into office. Some guy named ‘ Clinton ‘ established that policy. Bet you didn’t know that, did you?
You idiots need to understand that we face a unique enemy. Back during the cold war, there were two major competing political and economic models squaring off. We won that war, but we did so because fundamentally, the Communists wanted to survive, just as we do. We were simply able to outspend and out-tech them. That’s not the case this time. The soldiers of our new enemy don’t care if they survive. In fact, they want to die. That’s be fine, as long as they weren’t also committed to taking as many of you with them as they can. But they are. They want to kill you. And the bastards are all over the globe. You should be grateful that they haven’t gotten any more of us here in the United States since September 11. But you’re not. That’s because you’ve got no idea how hard a small number of intelligence, military, law enforcement and homeland security people have worked to make sure of that. When this whole mess started, I warned you that this would be a long and difficult fight. I’m disappointed how many of you people think a long and difficult fight amounts to a single season of ‘Survivor’.
Instead, you’ve grown impatient. You’re incapable of seeing things through the long lens of history, the way our enemies do. You think that wars should last a few months, a few years, tops.
Making matters worse, you actively support those who help the enemy. Every time you buy the New York Times, every time you send a donation to a cut-and-run Democrat’s political campaign, well, damn it, you might just as well Fedex a grenade launcher to a Jihadist. It amounts to the same thing.
In this day and age, it’s easy enough to find the truth. It’s all over the Internet. It just isn’t on the pages of the New York Times or on NBC News. But even if it were, I doubt you’d be any smarter. Most of you would rather watch American Idol. I could say more about your expectations that the Government will always be there to bail you out, even if you’re too stupid to leave a city that’s below sea level and has a hurricane approaching. I could say more about your insane belief that government, not your own wa
not your own wallet, is where the money comes from. But I’ve come to the conclusion that were I to do so, it would sail right over your heads.
So I quit. I’m going back to Crawford. I’ve got an energy-efficient house down there (Al Gore could only dream) and the capability to be fully self-sufficient. No one ever heard of Crawford before I got elected, and as soon as I’m done here pretty much no one will ever hear of it again. Maybe I’ll be lucky enough to die of old age before the last pillars of America fall.
Oh, and by the way, Cheney’s quitting too. That means Pelosi is your new President. You asked for it. Watch what she does carefully, because I still have a glimmer of hope that there’re just enough of you remaining who are smart enough to turn this thing around in 2008.
So that’s it. God bless what’s left of America . Some of you know what I mean.
Thats just a horrible mockery of him. Why do you think he was so bad. He is a good person and a good president.
I’ll admit some of it is funny, but the majority of it was in bad taste and shameful.
Hallelujah–I’m NOT the only one out here who gets it! Right on!
That was a great speech. Everyone in the barber shop of my rich white town and in business in general has been saying that stuff for years. The last person to be so bold was Joe McCarthy, a great patriot and scholar whose name is now a malediction because our media won. Too bad Bush just isnt that guy.
Maybe you or I should be. I know more about geopolitics than Obama. When he talks I cringe.
Unfortunately, that speech is given in this country and reasonable people are being driven out of office. I think with cable news and the internet loathsome politicians are getting much more air time and infecting our society with their wickedness and stupidity.
Thanks for that, man.
Accurate…. No. A good synopsis of Fox News’ stance as to the world… yes.
Bush bought a McMansion in Dallas (not an eco-palace in Crawford as you claim)… the markets have tanked…. gas is cheap now because the entire world economy is in the crapper….even the banks are broke… the backbone of American industry is nearly bankrupt… Bush flushed his trickle down toilet of an economy it by running up debts on America’s tab prosecuting wars that “We the People” never supported (and neither did anyone else in the world) and drained any political capital that his office enjoyed (as well as America’s prestige in the world). On top of that… as long as the definition of LYING is still saying things that are demonstrably UNTRUE then yep… Bush and his administration did LIE and more than 4200 Americans did in fact die.
The “long lens of history” is all he has… because the short lens sees him as an utter failure and an embarrasment to his country. Somehow I don’t see the “long lens” changing what we have all seen in real time. As soon as we exit Iraq that country will be reduced to absolute chaos again (even now “the surge” only succeeded in reducing violoence to the intolerable levels that existed in 2003).
So he drained the nations coffers, single handedly cost her her international prestige, set foreign relations back a decade or more, and trampled all over the document that has protected the people of this nation for 220 years. Worst of all he IS the ugly American… a clown for the rest of the world to spit upon (or throw shoes at if you are in the Arab world). Other than that…. he would have just been a mediocre, do-nothing President…. instead he makes Carter look like a genius with tremendous foresight.
Please… go on worshipping him at your leisure. He has single-handedly destroyed conservatism (and he was just as conservative as Lord Reagan) so at least the rest of us can be thankful for that.
So thank you for the points and enjoy your pasture sheeple.
EDIT: If having only one terrorist atack during your tenure is the mark of a good President then all you conservatives need to shut your pie holes about Clinton. That is the worst, most illogical argument that is continually spewed all over the internet. Carter… no terrorist attacks on American soil AT ALL during his tenure… must have been a great Prez. Herbert Hoover did a fine job too if that is your measuring stick. What a bunch of baffoons you sheep are. We didn’t get hit by a comet during the Bush years…. does he get credit for that too? No asteroids hit us either. No huge outbreaks of Bubonic Plague… wow… when you look at things through the eyes of a four-year-old Bush doesn’t look that bad at all I guess. Democrats are to blame for the attrocious state of the economy ( a Democrat left office with a balanced budget)…. Bush gets credit for low oil prices…and LACK of terrorist attacks… krist almighty the stupidity of the right knows no bounds.
hmmm. people who own the homes are having to foreclose. unemployment is at its worst in a long time. maybe you should do your homework!! the stock market is in a dump. for Gods sake!! American auto companies are going out of business! FORD, GM etc… people in THIS country are killing people in THIS country. maybe we should stop the terrorists here before we try to fix another country. (ie. KKK, Gangs, Oklahoma City Bombings….etc…) so proud of the war but hiding the bodies of our dead brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers. always with the smirk of the devil oh his face. Yeah….Great job Bush did
i love bushhhh
One of the truest things I have ever read about Bush it’s sad the way that our country has treated him for all he has done in reality he did a good job yes I said it HE DID A GOOD JOB if you don’t like it go f#$k yourself he kept us safe for 8 years we haven’t been attacked since 9-11 and the media has done nothing but try to make him look like an idiot he must have skin as thick as steel to put up with the crap he has had to take i hope he can get out of office and live a nice peaceful life and not have to put up with anymore scrutiny or ridicule from the idiots out there